Tuesday, October 31, 2017

10 Things You Learn as a Young Adult

11. The perfect job does not exist.
As a teenager, the “perfect job” doesn’t mean much to you as you are brought up in a world that says college is necessary in order to get your “dream job”. However, I learned as I got older, most precisely now, in what is considered my early twenties, that while you may find a job you love, there are going to be many negative and positive aspects of the job. This is also the point in time when you realize behind every success story are many many hours of hard work. While this can make your work life seem like a mountain you are struggling to climb, it can motivate you to want to prove yourself to go beyond your self-established limits.
    2. People are replaceable.
As an adult you will become very accustomed to goodbyes because everyone has their own life path and you are not always on that path. I have found many times that when one door closes on a friendship/relationship another one always opens. Of course it always hurts so much when you lose people you love. Eventually though you begin to accept that everyone you lose, is not a loss, because it saves you from a life full of hurt.

    3.  Karma is a bitch.
Karma is a bitch, and let me tell you it is best to be her best friend. Everyone will always get what they deserve, including yourself. I know that whenever I hurt someone, it’s going to come back around and hurt me someday too. In this, you also learn to not take people’s attitudes personally  as you know the universe is going to give them exactly what they deserve. This in turn will make you very self-aware and in the end helps you make better decisions in your own behavior.

  4.  Marriage will not magically fix your life.
Lord have mercy. You all have read my story many times. Marriage is not the key to success or happiness in life. If you have problems before marriage, whether with yourself or life, those problems don’t magically disappear. Sometimes they become worse. Today’s world makes marriage in a life goal that somehow makes your life beautiful and happy in theory. However, I found that marriage is not easy and it’s full of many responsibilities- it’s nothing like the movies. If you get married for the wrong reasons, (for a fairytale life) it will most likely end in disaster. Just do you- someone will come along.

55. Comparing yourself to others doesn’t fix anything either.
Sure comparing your life to others’ lives could be used as a form of self-motivation. In my case, what starts out as self-motivation turns into self-negativity that will grow into a big ugly monster that keeps you up at night, convincing you that you are a failure and will never be anything better. But life isn’t about competing with others. Behind every perfect picture you see on social media of someone’s life you envy, are problems and secrets that would never even cross your mind. “Never judge a book by it’s cover,” has never been more true that when you become an adult.

66. People will always talk to you and about you.
Everyone around you will always offer and sometimes attempt to force their opinions on you because that’s what worked for them or their brother’s wife’s cousin’s uncle. You know your own life and circumstances better than anyone. I’ve found hearing the advice is a good thing but taking every single word to heart is as about as useful as a bible to an atheist. And of course people will always talk about you when you aren’t there. Just remember though, Karma will come around. Your actions effect your life, their words do not.

77. Love at first sight does not exist, except…
I believe that love at first sight does exist in the case of a mother giving birth and seeing her child for the first time. As far as romantic relationships go, it’s no longer a nervous stomach and hormones flying all over the place- which is mistaken as love at first sight. I learned as I stepped into my first 20 year that love is having a relationship with someone that is a good listener when you’ve had a bad day and a good supporter when life has just totally taken a dump on your head. Love is when a person is willing to take time out of their busy life for you. Love is working together as a team. All of this doesn’t come at first sight, but rather after many long moments spend building together.

  8.Ninety percent of the time, people are not sincere.
I learned the hard way that the majority of people are not trustworthy. I have also learned that the will to survive is very strong, and if you are surviving, someone who is not, will find you and attempt to attach themselves to you like a parasite to its host, sucking the life and all of your happiness out of you. People will always hurt you and disappoint you. Someone once told me, “Show someone how to break your heart once, and they will continue to break it many times over.”

  9.You can’t always have what you want.
By now you know, life never goes as planned. Things you so desperately want, are not always what you need. I have had to learn to accept my failures and realize that there is another door open on the other side of the door that just slammed shut in my face. You have to be willing to work for the things you need and then you will find that the things you want come so much easier.

10.  You will have many ugly scars.
The previous nine things will give you so many scars. Learning about them the hard way will cut you open and leave you vulnerable. I have faced so many failures, rejections and negativities already in my young life, I know there will be more to come. I have gotten hurt and lost, but in the end I always find my way back- we all do. The beginning of my adulthood has been one big mess. But I am not afraid of failure and I’ve been told that is a sign of success.


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